Generally in a relationship it occurs that at least one of the associates is not true to himself/herself. This happens for a variety of reasons:
HE, for example, desires to split up but is scared to be alone; this individual wants to confess about an affair but is scared of the results; he definitely feels responsibility to his grown-up children than to his new partner, but doesn’t always have the courage to be honest to her; and so on and so forth. comment oublier son ex ?
The lady, on the other side, hates just how he makes wish to her but isn’t very assertive enough to bring it up in the open; is tired about asking him to a help her around the house, but doesn’t want to confront him regarding it, afraid he might feel she doesn’t regard him as “a man”; your woman feels frustrated about him not inviting her away to restaurants as often as she would have loved to, but hesitates to accept the issue up, fearing he may get angry, and so on etc.
Two people in a relationship, none of them true to himself/herself
From the tender there are two people, in a relationship, none of whom is true to himself/herself, none of to whom gets the courage to bring up issues for dialogue with the partner. Since a result, due to being dissatisfied with the partner and with the relationship, they both respond in a passive-aggressive way with one another.
“Well, at least I was not by yourself, inch each of them is quietly thinking.
“Well, at least I don’t rock and roll the sevyloyr fish seeker 360, ” each of them calms himself/herself down.
“Well, who said a relationship should be perfect? ” they each ask, “is there anything such as a perfect relationship? ” they comfort themselves, each of them separately, but in some way together.
The actual them stay together?
So what on earth makes them stay together is their silent, shared “agreement”, that their relationship is not good, but…
It might well be that regarding for their own standards, perception system, and “shared” view of partners and interactions, the actual experience in their relationship is merely “normal”; “they way things always are in a relationship”.
Do they feel they sacrifice much by not being true to themselves – and their spouse? Maybe not: it is likely that they may know better. After all, they both might have experienced failed relationships in their past; both might have separated or single (maybe even more than once); both could have never allowed themselves to distributed out up to their partners and communicate honestly and honestly.
So as much as some may appear like the other person in their patterns, it doesn’t yet imply that they have much in common and/or soul-mates. The opposite might be true: they are neither “relationship-wise” nor soul-mates. What they are is merely two people in need for love who gotten attached to the other person therefore of anxieties and desires which control them and drive them to stay together; to act the way they do; to cling on to each other, feeling not really happy but, “you cannot expect many techniques from a spouse and from a relationship”, they tell themselves, gently, each in own mind, time and again.
The difference between choosing a partner and a romance or escaping into them
What it all enables us know is simple: when you approach a relationship not with the intention to gain something significant in your life but rather to be able to escape something – whether it is escape from loneliness, from feeling not worthwhile, from being disillusioned with life and looking for something to “fill the void” – when you look for somebody and strategy relationships with such an attitude, it is quite sure that you will wrap up – if at all – in a relationship in which you will not be true neither to yourself or to your partner.